This is what it’s like to get a pixie cut.
Spend a whole year thinking about it.
Search “pixie cut for round faces” half a dozen times, decide your face is more long than round, search “pixie cut for long faces” twenty times, and then just look at generic pixie cuts because you can’t figure out your face shape.
Find the perfect pixie cut.
Procrastinate on setting the appointment.
Panic and set the appointment as soon as possible.
Spend a restless day and a sleepless night psyching up for this moment.
Ask your husband a million times if he’ll still love you with short hair.
Feel like you’re going to puke, pass out, or burst into tears in the hours leading up to your appointment.
Think about texting your husband that you feel more nervous now than you did on your wedding day.
Delete that text because you don’t know what that says about you.
Drive past the salon a couple times.
Look completely clueless and lost at the salon, especially because everyone’s dressed up as reindeer.
See lots of pretty young hairstylists with gorgeous long hair.
Make awkward small talk with your stylist who (thank God!) is dressed as a normal, sensible human being. With gorgeous long hair.
Feel liberated when she chops off two feet of hair. Yes. This, like marrying your husband, was something you wanted and needed to do.
Wonder how this hair style looks remotely like the picture you showed, but she knows what she’s doing, right, and maybe there’s special pixie cut magic five minutes before you leave that makes it look just right.
It doesn’t look right.
Don’t say anything because the stylist loves it, and her supervisor loves it, and the random stylist who sees you sitting there forlornly loves it, and you’re a people pleaser, and you haven’t had time to overcome your besetting weaknesses, and you’ve been sitting there for two hours, and it’s five o’clock, and you can’t believe you spent half of your year freaking out over getting a pixie cut only to not get a pixie cut.
Stylist gives you chocolate.
Still feel upset because you’re a complicated woman and chocolate doesn’t solve your problems.
Sister tells you that you look cute.
Stare at yourself in every mirror in the house.
Decide she’s right.
Take bathroom selfies.
Oh, and here’s the back:
I mean, for not being a pixie cut, it’s still pretty fly.